Meet Rabia & Jenny

 How Two Healthcare Professionals Ended Up Creating a Dating Course...

We met through a mutual patient, Jenny, a licensed trauma counselor, and Rabia, a functional medicine provider—an immediately bonded through our shared passion for root cause healthcare. We were both obsessed with getting to the bottom of why people suffered, not just treating symptoms. Jenny was helping clients heal from trauma and attachment wounds. Rabia was uncovering the hidden connections between stress, trauma, and chronic illness.

Professionally, we were confident. Women came to us seeking healing, and we got them results. We had the degrees, the expertise, the whole "wise healer" thing down pat. 

But meanwhile, our personal lives were falling apart. We were both struggling in marriages where we poured everything we had into relationships that were killing us. We were over-functioning at home and work, abandoning our true needs and desires to try to make relationships work with men who were not willing or able to meet us. Our expectations for love were in hell, but we thought if we just keep trying to figure out what's wrong we could fix the root cause of what was broken in our marriages, just like we did with our patients.

Then came the wake-up calls. Within months of each other, we both hit our breaking points and walked the scary path of divorce. And suddenly we were faced with a terrifying reality: we had no idea what we were doing in our new single lives, especially in the dating world.

We wanted love—but we were terrified of repeating the past. We were knee-deep in the hellscape that is modern dating, feeling utterly confused, hopeless, and afraid we were going to end up alone. Or worse... What if we ended up in another soul sucking relationship where we completely lost ourselves? What if we settled for another man who couldn't love us well?

So instead of jumping back into dating, we got help. We threw ourselves into therapy and did a deep dive into the science of relationships—attachment theory, trauma, nervous system science, the works. Basically became giant relational science nerds trying to figure out how we got it so wrong.

Then something clicked. We started taking what we learned in therapy and applying it to our dating lives. We compared notes with each other and slowly watched ourselves transform from women who tolerated too much bullshit to women who knew their worth.

We realized we weren't broken—just operating from old programming that told us we had to work for love, self-sacrifice, and that asking for what we needed was "too much."

So we became students of our own patterns. We used every dating experience as practice—setting real boundaries, holding high standards, and noticing our automatic responses when old wounds got triggered. We surrounded ourselves with calm, loving people and supported each other through the messy process of unlearning generations of conditioning.

Slowly, something shifted. We began to trust that the right partner would be drawn to our high expectations, not repelled by them. We began to trust ourselves—our instincts, our worth, our right to ask for what we needed. It was the beginning of coming home to ourselves.

People started noticing the shift: "What have you been doing? You seem... different, like really happy. You're glowing."

And that's how Alchemy of She was born. We realized we had stumbled onto something powerful, but we also knew it worked because we had each other. We couldn't send every woman out there a bestie who understood nervous system science, but we could create a program that gave women the same support, accountability, and science-backed framework that transformed our lives.

Because here's the thing: You can't think your way out of relationship patterns that were wired into your nervous system before you could even talk. You have to actually rewire your nervous system to feel safe enough to do what it takes to call in healthy love—and that requires understanding why you learned to settle in the first place and actively doing something different. But you don't have to do it alone.

Today, we help smart, successful women stop dating from their wounds and start dating from their worth. Using the same science-backed approach that helped us go from tolerating anything to commanding everything, we teach women to expect better, ask for more, and never settle for less than they deserve—with the support and community that makes lasting change possible.

The best part? Watching women come alive to themselves as they keep their hearts open to love, but no longer accept crumbs because they know they deserve the whole damn feast.

“Your task is not to seek for love, but merely to seek and find all the barriers within yourself that you have built against it.”  -Rumi